By Dr. Floyd Godfrey

Raising teenagers is a journey that no parent should have to take alone. God never intended for families to function in isolation. Throughout scripture, we see examples of community and shared responsibility in helping the next generation grow in faith and maturity. When it comes to guiding teens through their formative years, leaning into the strength of your church family, small group leaders, and even extended family can provide a deeply rooted support system that benefits everyone, especially your children.

As parents, we often feel a great burden to protect, guide, and mentor our teens. While this responsibility is important, we must also be wise enough to recognize that others may reach our children in ways we cannot. Sometimes a teenager simply needs a listening ear from someone who isn’t mom or dad. That doesn’t mean we’re doing something wrong, it means our teens are human, and they’re learning to relate to the world around them. This is where your team comes in.

Youth pastors, small group leaders, and trusted adult mentors can offer spiritual insight and a fresh perspective that supports the values you're teaching at home. It’s crucial to build relationships with these leaders, not only so your teen knows you’re united, but also so you, as parents, can trust and partner with them intentionally.

In our own parenting journey, when our children were teens, my wife and I would take the time to speak with extended family members ahead of time. We asked if they would be willing to serve as a “sounding board” for our kids, in case our children ever wanted to talk with someone besides us. We made it clear that they didn’t have to try to “fix” anything, just to be present, to listen, and to offer a safe space for conversation.

We also gave those family members permission to maintain privacy with our teens unless there was ever a safety concern. That was a hard decision, but we knew that if our children didn’t feel their conversations were protected, they wouldn’t open up at all. By releasing control in this way, we showed our kids that we trusted them, and we trusted the people God had placed in our lives.

This kind of teamwork requires humility and communication. It’s not about trying to manage every interaction; it’s about building a circle of trust around your teen, one that reflects God’s grace and truth. Whether it’s a youth pastor having lunch with your son after a tough week at school, or an aunt listening quietly as your daughter works through a big decision, these moments matter. They are part of the larger story God is writing in your teen’s life.

If you haven’t already, start reaching out. Ask your church leaders how they engage with teens and let them know you’re grateful for their influence. Speak with extended family members and give them permission to play a role in your teen’s life. These conversations are small steps that lead to big impact.

Parenting through the teen years is not a solo mission. It’s a team effort, one that reflects the body of Christ working together in love, truth, and unity. And as you walk this path, remember that God has already placed people in your life who are ready to walk it with you.

Floyd Godfrey PhD is a Board Certified Christian Counselor and has facilitated groups within different churches and denominations over the past 30 years. He worked as a licensed clinician for 23 years and provided supervision and training for other counselors as they worked toward independent licensure. You can read more about Floyd Godfrey PhD at www.FloydGodfrey.com.